HIV-Negative: How the Uninfected Are Affected by AIDS
Copyright © 1995 by William I. Johnston
New York: Insight Books-Plenum Press
Foreword Witnessing the Epidemic Eric Rofes
Prologue Boccaccio's Lesson Giovanni Boccaccio
Introduction Climbing to Angels Landing
The Gravity of HIV Infection
The Position of the HIV-Negative
Neglecting the HIV-Negative
Addressing the HIV-Negative
Scope of the Interviews
Interview Sources
Audience
Returning from Angels Landing
Chapter 1 A Stranger Comes to Town Anthony Tommasini
Chapter 2 Like Ripping a Bandage Off Sandro Costa
Chapter 3 Before the Test
Got AIDS Yet?
Searching for Symptoms
Inventing Safer Sex
Fearing Being Infectious
Bad Blood
Precious Bodily Fluids
Inventing Unsafe Sex
Standing before the Test
Chapter 4 Something Tremendously Valuable Robert Newman
Chapter 5 Considering Testing
Breaking the Clamshell
Two Sides of the Paper
The Early Purpose of Testing
Fearing a Positive Result
Fearing a Negative Result
Fear of Division among Gay Men
The Value of an Undifferentiated Community
Chapter 6 Hope Is Victory Paul Fielding
Chapter 7 Getting Tested
The Outside of the Envelope
Changing Attitudes toward Testing
Reasons for Getting Tested
Going for the Test
Waiting for the Results
Chapter 8 A Snake in Your Pocket Claude Dupont
Chapter 9 Reactions to Testing Negative
Unexpected News
Relief
Elation
Feeling Lucky
Disbelief and Doubt
Survivor's Guilt
Reluctance to Disclose Negative Results
Isolation
Disappointment, Despair, and Depression
Acceptance
Chapter 10 A Mark of Intimacy Sam Pappadopoulos
Chapter 11 Division by HIV Status
Dancing with HIV
AIDS as Other
The Meanings of HIV Status
HIV Negativity as Revirginization
HIV-Negative Seeks Same
HIV-Positive Seeks Same
AIDS Apartheid
The Price of Division
The Desire to Escape
Chapter 12 I See Blue Real Blue Matthew Lasalle
Chapter 13 Positive-Negative Couples
Not the Kramdens
Learning of Mixed HIV Status
Telling Others
Having Sex
Feeling Safe with a Positive Partner
Thinking about Seroconverting
Managing a Partner's Illness
Living in the Present
Chapter 14 Pillars of Monogamy Don Willet
Chapter 15 Negative-Negative Couples
Find a Nice Negative Boy
Virtual HIV
Protected Sex in Negative-Negative Couples
Unprotected Sex in Negative-Negative Couples
Cautions against Unprotected Sex
Protected Sex as War Effort
Chapter 16 Solid Foods Aren't Good for You Ryan Joseph
Chapter 17 Deciding What's Unsafe
Double Bagging
Looking for Experts
The Meanings of Unsafe Sex
Reasons for Unsafe Sex
Negotiating Safer Sex
Balancing Risk and Pleasure
Chapter 18 My Seed Is in You Frank Ruggero
Chapter 19 Retesting and Seroconversion
A Cat with Nine Lives
Situational Testing
Regular Testing
Chronic Testing
Helping Chronic Testers
The Desire to Seroconvert
The Responsibility to Stay Uninfected
Nie Wieder Plague
The Likelihood of Staying Uninfected
Living with Uncertainty
Chapter 20 Yeah, Ma, I'm Okay Nathaniel McNaughton
Chapter 21 HIV-Negative Identity
The HIV-Negative Button
Two T-Shirt Designs
The Development of HIV-Positive Identity
The Fragility of HIV-Negative Identity
The Absence of a Condition
HIV-Negative Pride
Chapter 22 We Want Kansas City Trucking James Douglas
Chapter 23 "Fog," "Faith," and "Atlantis" Mark Doty
Conclusion Looking to the Future
Ambivalence about the Future
Contemplating Fewtopia
Living in the Present
Not Wanting to Celebrate
Envisioning the Future
Accommodating the Virus
The Way We Live Now
Appendix A Starting an HIV-Negative Support Group
Origins
Mission
Participants
Format
Organization
Ground Rules
Discussion Topics
Obstacles
Outreach
Impact
Appendix B Discussion Questions
Dealing with Grief and Loss
Testing Issues
Attitudes toward Retesting
HIV and Disclosure
Being with HIV-Positive Friends and Lovers
Is It Ever Safe to Have Unprotected Sex?
Self-Esteem, Substance Use, and Sex
Times I've Had Unsafe Sex--or Wanted To
Sex Talk: Learning to Say How and When
The Role of Our Sexual Fantasies
Seroconverting
What's in Our Future?
Appendix C Resources
Telephone Information
HIV-Negative Support Services
Newspaper Articles
Journal and Magazine Articles
Books
Notes
Prologue: Boccaccio's Lesson
Introduction: Climbing to Angels Landing
Chapter 5: Considering Testing
Chapter 9: Reactions to Testing Negative
Chapter 11: Division by HIV Status
Chapter 15: Negative-Negative Couples
Chapter 17: Deciding What's Unsafe
Chapter 19: Retesting and Seroconversion
Chapter 21: HIV-Negative Identity
Conclusion: Looking to the Future
Contributors
About the Author
Acknowledgments
Library of Congress Data
Ordering Information